The Mac Memoirs of An Academic: A Comical Saga of Tech Trials and Tinkering (Part 1)

My academic adventure in the land of Appledom began back in 2014. I foolishly splurged on a MacBook Pro 13 inch 2012, draining my wallet faster than a thirsty vampire at a blood bank. Clutching the box, I attempted to justify my extravagant purchase, finding solace in the promise of a fourteen-day return policy. I convinced myself that if things went south, I could reclaim my precious funds and subsist on a diet of plain bread and butter until my sponsor bailed me out.

But why did I succumb to the allure of the Mac in the first place? Well, NVDA was going through puberty at the time, with plenty of growing pains. I practically lived in the library and needed a machine that could survive the academic apocalypse. Windows laptops barely lasted a coffee break with a a lovey lady, which was unacceptable given my penchant for plugging in a gazillion peripherals, draining the battery faster than a Formula 1 car on an empty tank. Plus, I’m a keyboard warrior putting in a minimum of 12 hours a day, and those flimsy laptop keyboards couldn’t handle my literary frenzy. Within weeks, their keys felt as fluffy as cotton balls, rendering my typing experience akin to navigating a marshmallow maze. JAWS? Yeah, right, as if I could afford that luxury when even my stomach was protesting the budget crunch. Then I am a man who likes change, women are an exception, I do not like moving between women! I wanted something different, something that can give you different experience in a tedious time of thesis write up.
So, in the spirit of change and a touch of FOMO, I leaped into the Apple universe, avoiding the Linux labyrinth like a plague-infested maze. The promise of a swift OS and heavenly user satisfaction lured me in, leading to the fateful day of acquiring my first MacBook. I hailed an Uber to the city center, only to be abandoned amidst a cacophony of baffling foreign tongues. Lost and bewildered, I stumbled upon a troop of linguistically challenged helpers, desperately trying to locate the elusive Apple Store. With their gracious assistance, I finally reached the promised land, where I haggled with an Apple salesperson, negotiating an educational discount that felt like winning the lottery—a whopping 14% off! As I reminisce about the first unboxing, it was akin to peeling a stubborn sweet potato on a freezing January night, except this time the thrill was in the aluminum coating. The typing experience was like caressing clouds, and the sound quality? Well, who needs audiophile ears when you’re content with the auditory prowess of a tin can telephone? Ah, the quirks and caveats of my Apple odyssey—truly a tale of thrifty triumph and technological temptation!

That old MacBook Pro gave me more trouble than a rambunctious toddler on a sugar high. Not only did it overheat faster than a popcorn machine at a movie marathon, but that spinning HDD sounded like a deranged DJ at a disco. I spent what felt like an eternity tinkering and breaking things, gradually building up the courage to bid farewell to my Windows counterpart. Then, in a stroke of DIY brilliance, I scoured Amazon one fine December day in 2014, uncovering a shiny Samsung Evo 850 SSD beckoning to me like a technological siren. Armed with a set of screwdrivers and a dream, I dove headfirst into the perilous world of self-upgrades, bolstering my financial disaster by splurging on a RAM upgrade from 4GB to 8GB. Miraculously, all the packages arrived in a single day, as if the universe had suddenly taken pity on my poor, beleaguered soul. I took the leap, swapping and upgrading like a tech-savvy magician pulling off the ultimate trick, and voilà! A FrankenMacBook was born, my humble testament to perseverance and a splash of reckless determination.
Well, my Mac transformation was nothing short of a technological rebirth! Suddenly, it managed heat like a seasoned yogi, granting me an extra hour of battery life, and transformed into the silent ninja of the laptop world, handling even the toughest tasks with a hush. And all this tech wizardry only set me back a steeping £115, excluding the price of the Mac itself! That’s the price of saying goodbye to the humble bread and butter diet and indulging in a gourmet feast of burgers and pizzas topped with all the exuberance of a carnival parade. But alas, the cruel twist of fate—my Mac, with all its upgraded glory, only stayed faithful for a paltry six months! Talk about a short-lived romance! Did I get what I didn’t deserve, you ask? Nah, it wasn’t some karmic retribution. I just had to face the bitter reality and shell out for yet another tech companion. The 13-inch Mac, while spruced up and sprightly, weighed as much as a small boulder, tipping the scales at a back-breaking 2 kilograms. I needed something lighter!

And then entered the hero of my tech saga—the Mac Air 11 inch, a pocket-sized powerhouse that swept me off my feet. Let me tell you, it checked all the boxes like a diligent exam proctor. With a battery life boasting a marathon-worthy 9 hours, it was as light as a feather in a wind tunnel, a keyboard that felt like typing on clouds, and sound quality that could rival a symphony hall. Built like a tank, it weathered storms like a seasoned sailor, even though it did grapple with the pesky issue of having ports scarcer than a desert oasis. But oh, the irony! Despite its petite charm, my darling 11-inch Mac Air struggled to command the attention it deserved in my bustling lab, leaving me to chuckle at the puny struggles of this mighty miniature.
Those two machines got me a wonderful threesome experience, me and the heavy 13 inch in the office, me and the 11 inch in cafes or at Saturday night with wife and the two daughters, me and the 13 inch in supervisory meeting, me and the 11 inch in travels.
And there you have it, folks, the thrilling first chapter of my tryst with the Apple ecosystem. But fear not, for the tale doesn’t end here! Stay tuned for the next episode, where I spill the beans on why my beloved Mac and I had to part ways, and how fate eventually conspired to bring us back together. Until then, thanks for joining me on this rollercoaster ride of tech trials and tribulations! Keep those popcorn bowls ready for the next installment!